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/eris/ - Discordianism

Hail Eris! All hail Discordia!
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File: 1581955478519.png (148.41 KB, 480x480, erischaoticneutral.png)


Would it be time for new discordian books/magazines in the current year?

The PD forums had some run of inter-mittens as some fanzine in the early 2000s about philosophy and discordianism. I'd like to see more erisian works pop out on the internet that would be as interesting as the Principia with more Internet related culture and values reflected inside but I wonder if there is a demand for such a thing.


I'll make sure to remember this once I get in the mood for schizoposting.


Good. We could pitch in ideas, concepts, shitpost about discordianism the way the old guard like Bob Wilson and Greg Thornley probably did. Just keeping the idea alive and evolving somehow. Or not.


discordians are probably too lazy to get into writing these days, and too old to learn how to make new media. I'm afraid we'll have to start over, seeing as discordianism is slowly dying out, someone will have to make a hip new basis to fit the times.


There has been constant flow of new text and even couple books recently.


Even just a collective of essays along with OC abstract art with a discordian theme to it could work for me, given the lack of material produced. Out of all things, I came across discovering Discordianism from a graffiti at a bar I used to go to.
Hail Eris! Repent where there shall be three. was the message. That's the only time I ever came across anything discordian in my area ever since.

My vision of it was a collective of works of modern Discordians reflecting on the topic, almost 60 years later. The book, the relevance, the legacy of it's underground status as a classic. There's plenty to offer on the topic. I could publish a few short texts whenever I can be bothered to type it down on a spare moment.

As the format, it would be easily converted to a .PDF file for any media that can read it which is readily available. People have done this before.


>discordians are probably too lazy to get into writing these days, and too old to learn how to make new media
Shows what you know, this poetry thread had original content.
It's a shame the images are all gone, I might try and get 8kun to restore the images and archive them. Speaking of images, I created that OP image. Chicken Balls Z


File: 1587918000840.png (175.4 KB, 620x877, Erisian-2020-issue-1-small.png)

Thanks OP for sending me an advance copy of the first issue, it's pretty cool if I do say so myself.


That's pretty great. Fuck it, I'll help make a magazine.
What do Discordians want to see in the first edition of Erisian?
My potential ideas:
>a few art pages (visual art, poetry, music, etc.)
>puzzle pages
>discussions of philosophy, cabals, saints and games
>highlights from various online communities (e.g. most popular recent posts on erischan, discordian forums, discordian subreddit)
>TROMAnimation panel question regarding Eris's inclusion in Billy & Mandy >>>/b/2046
>sightings in the wild (of either Eris or discordians)


OP here, pretty damn great cover.
Liking the name too.

I'd write an article or two but at the moment, i'm stuck with some finals to do for the next two weeks. I'd definitelyat least write one about RAW though.

As far as submission of works go, should we use something like Pastebin or does someone have a better idea?


All good, we're not going to rush it out in two weeks.
>should we use something like Pastebin or does someone have a better idea?
As long as no-one needs to login to view it, I'm fine. Sites with less bloat and trackers are preferred. Pastebin works fine for long text without formatting, it's probably best to use Pastebin or Zerobin (https://bin.privacytools.io), Pastebin is easier. If you need to keep formatting then I guess upload a .pdf here and we'll talk about it (if it's just a bit of bold and color then I can copy that no problem).
pomf clones (like catbox.moe) can work for assorted files, but if you want to submit images or pdfs then just upload right here if you can.
Always keep editable filetypes saved where possible (don't send a .pdf without having a source file on hand in case we agree it would be better off changed). Don't compress or reduce quality, that's the editor's job!

If you want me to organize stuff and compile the 'zine, I can.


File: 1588140174548.jpg (247.01 KB, 1920x1080, mobile-email-ss-1920.jpg)

Just make an email address and let people send their submissions to you.


I'm trying to make a constructed language for Discordianism, but it's hard to choose what theme and style fits it best.
Currently choosing a limited amount of cool-sounding syllables and putting them through a gibberish generator. I'll then take cool words from the gibberish generator and use them to replace words in Toki Pona. When we've got our own strange version of that conlang, we can start changing its syntax and adding our own words.
I wanted to go with a latin vibe, but after testing it, I'm not too sure anymore.

"er","na","re","va","ta","nus","ra","ro","qo","ver","par","ner","is","ha" produces something like;
vaqoroverner. ha ha narora par reqo. rais ta paris iserro isva. raqoer nus re. reqo nertais isverro er par ra ha.


"I ducked the point hurling towards my head and made my way to the nearest hot dog stand"
-poor misinformed erisian

You may have hear the rumor about the demise of our beloved Discordianism. IT IS NOT TRUE. Discordianism, while it might have ceased its kicking, is very alive at the time of me writing this. But as with all things, time has taken it's toll. As the punk scene has grown to a bitter middle age man groping teenage girls, discordianism lies in hospital bed with several different types of cancer and very severe nosebleed, and all you greedy, fetid relatives have gathered around to squabble about the inheritance.

Shame on you! Everyone knows a True follower of Discordja doesn't play by the rules. I myself have already counterfeited multiple versions of the testaments, promising teeth, toes, or fingers shared between over 300 individuals (you do the math). You thing wanking Eris's flaccid dick is going to give you some special treatment? She despises you fools. While way ago, some have taken her teachings and ran. Ran to achieve GREAT THINGS, while you kept parroting shit about hotdogs, turkeys, and whatnot.

Discordia died of boredom.

And YOU killed her.


I made this place specifically to avoid any further hippie joke forefront shit.
Hotdogs, turkeys, "le randumb silly thing". We can do better than this.


Nah, I'd prefer an open collaborative process.

Absolutely wasted GET.


Actually, email isn't a bad idea. I'll set one up tonight.


It's an article dumdum. To flesh out the whatever thing you know. The thing with hot dog jokes in cover you know.


Wow this guy is SERIOUS!


I'm a REAL discordian unlike you schmucks!


No your an obvious parody. Try harder.


File: 1588175354238.png (11.45 KB, 635x84, Screenshot_2020-04-29_17-4….png)


File: 1588211383869.png (1.7 MB, 2000x1500, mndy.png)

Unless I hear complaints worth hearing, I hereby appoint myself the first saint of magazine editing.
You may contact me in this thread or at at: erisian@airmail.cc

I will take this early opportunity to discuss contribution guidelines. Tell me which fit snugly into your frame of preconceptions, and which are full of shit.

>these guidelines must be followed at all times except at any time you dont agree with them.

>to ensure quality and transparency, articles will always be posted or reposted here for peer review before publication. find the construction inherit in our destruction and mutate your article until it becomes kind of ok. that doesnt mean be conformant, rather, be valuable.
>pseudonymous contributions (preferably, but not necessarily, 'Pope [X]') are highly recommended. you may use an infinite number of pseudonyms. you may be impersonated at any time however it is preferred that any impersonation be intentionally imperfect and obvious to detect. attention seekers beware.
>unironic political content is likely to be rejected as off-topic or low-quality. only be as edgy as you need to be.
>declare sources (url preferred) for anything you did not make, including pictures you found on google images and any anon posts. you do not need legal permission, I simply wish to give credit where credit is due. credits will be on that page at the end no-one reads. you may request any crediting name on that page for your content so long as it isnt impersonation.
>be less of a cunt than everyone else

I think I see the useful idea you are getting at but I feel it needs better execution in the third paragraph. To me it seems somewhat hypocritical (and not in a good way).


File: 1588272887422.png (165.51 KB, 512x384, b9a1ad2cacb4af6cd6adad8d20….png)

This is the original, there was no hole.


You're right.
It's like drawing van Gogh with two ears. For much of his adult life it's correct, but it's a defining characteristic of him.


I'll do a short article on 136199 Eris, who was proposed as a tenth planet before being snubbed, inspiring the debate and discord surrounding the infamous removal of Pluto from the list of planets.


Over the past few years, I have learned to be skeptical of commercial news, but I found myself falling into the trap of blindly trusting the news skeptics! Like many others out there, I was bamboozled by this new crazy age of free information and discourse, by the contradictory insights and opinions and claims and analyses. I needed to learn how to find out which websites I could trust if I ever wished to find any truth in the universe! In my chaotic scrambles across the web, I uncovered Discordianism and their Goddess of Discord. If anyone understands this mess of a world, it must be Her!

That night, I found Eris and began to pray:
"In these confusing times, I seek your guidance, o Eris Discordia. I beseech thee to teach me. Is it true that-"
"Are you sure?"

And I was enlightened.


Post a few signs of being a greyface and we'll compile 23 of the best. Add pseudonyms to your name if you want credit.
>Being uncertain about something might possibly make you anxious sometimes, depending on various things.
>You can accurately write down a diary entry for tomorrow.
>When you read this article in a mirror, you don't understand where all these new 'dronf' words are coming from.



Thanks for the .svg . You get the final say on this decision (with or without are both canonically acceptable). I'll edit the gap in if you approve.

>You read all of these in order.


File: 1588461456501.jpg (31.94 KB, 660x660, hugkallisti.jpg)

OP again. I'm proud of you cabbages. I didn't expect you guys to actually go through with it. I'll post some ramblings here if it's in text only. Wrote a small article about RAW, covid and the concept of a reality tunnel and tuning out from all the misery and despair we currently live in. I need to finish it though.

I'm just contributing this meme I stole from Facebook for now. Enjoy.


File: 1588503630662.jpg (28.59 KB, 386x384, Eris_and_dysnomia2.jpg)

[first draft. reasonably scientifically accurate.]

This is an article about 136199 Eris.
136199 Eris is a big round thing in the Solar System, discovered about three halves of a decade ago (Setting Orange Chaos 5th, YOLD 3171) by three Popes, named Mike Brown, Chad Trujillo, and David Rabinowitz.
This thing is pretty big. Not quite as big as Earth or Mercury but almost as big as Pluto and far heavier. Don't say that to 136199 Eris's face though; you'd totally lose in a fight.
Because of it's Plutonian size, NASA released an initial report titling 136199 Eris (nicknamed 'Xena', probably because NASA don't know Greek) as the new '10th Planet' of the Solar System. However, before they could send an official invitation, another bunch of astronomers called Eris a big troublemaker and then callously Snubbed both Eris and Pluto from the list of planets in one astronomical blow. Even to a distant planetoid like Pluto, that's just cold.


File: 1588503679162.jpeg (28.41 KB, 474x315, Eris (it's only a model).jpeg)

As if we hadn't learned already from history, snubbing Eris is the absolute surest way to start a massive fight (followed closely by political discourse and hitting someone in the face, respectively)
The demotion of Pluto to a 'dwarf planet' caused immediate and widespread outrage among people who had known Pluto for their entire lives. Astronomers started releasing scathing comments. Magazines started releasing waves of articles. Book publishers started releasing newer overpriced textbooks. Students had to buy newer overpriced textbooks. 'Plutoed' became the American Dialect Society's Word of the Year. Popular culture had changed forever. It is speculated by Erisian Magazine that after a few millenia, this snubbing may cause Pluto worship to see a revival in interest similar to that of Eris in the past century.
However, as a cruel retaliation for the chaos Eris brought upon the astronomy community, it still remains the largest object in our Solar System that has not been visited by a spacecraft. Once again, Eris has been snubbed and has become the scapegoat.
So, next Pluto Demoted Day (Bureaucracy 17th, quite appropriately) we ask that you commemorate not only the snubbing of the Ninth Planet (Pluto) but also of the Tenth Planet: Eris.

(The International Astronomical Union (IAU) have not yet provided a statement to Discordians, Erisians nor Eridians (the alleged or future inhabitants of 136199 Eris) regarding their reckless crime against the universe.)


File: 1588547923372.png (42.39 KB, 554x259, 2020-05-04-021708_2646x102….png)


Eris, unlike the classic planets and old dwarf planets of Ceres and Pluto, has no official symbol. One of the symbols of Five fingered hand of Eris symbol.svg, known as "Hand of Eris", is the most widespread. Also used is the Eris symbol 2.svg[24]. Astrologers are most interested in this issue and use the following symbols:
the "all-seeing eye" of Eye of Providence.svg suggested by Zane Stein,
Eris symbol variant.svg, proposed by Henry Seltzer,
Eris-symbol-Poland.svg, popular with Polish astrologers[25].


UNICODE did add the unofficial symbol though. ERIS FORM ONE ⯰.
Submitted 2016, added in Unicode 11 in 2018. Most fonts don't have it covered, but it is very much a thing, even if not considered official by the IAU.


What's it with the Polish?


File: 1588621067850.gif (239.13 KB, 320x240, 1399504297745.gif)

Did you know? 5 is a holy number in Discordianism because on the 5th of the month Eris - with the assistance of the Erinyes - gave birth to Horkos, the personification of oath.
So every 5th of the month in the Discordian Calendar we celebrate Horkos's peculiar viciousness that day and see if our friends truly do hold to their truth by playing board games together! Whoever cheats is taken away by Horkos himself, and thrown off a cliff!


File: 1588660657469.jpg (70.8 KB, 736x736, 766b30d140e57e2ca226d10c78….jpg)

How much more content do we need for a 23 pages long issue?


Just use bigger font and leave blank pages


File: 1588674938111.png (184 KB, 1920x1080, da15d55a-72bb-4e2b-b2f8-26….png)

Add images explaining important discordian concepts


File: 1588747152677.pdf (77.48 KB, example.pdf)

I donate the following two pages for consideration, in case some of you might find either of them slightly amusing.


File: 1588750061262.jpg (1.68 MB, 1944x2592, Moai_Rano_raraku.jpg)

>You are unable to fully appreciate how Eris's elastic golden lessons shine bitterly invisible.
>You are reading through this magazine in order from the first page to the last. No, don't start reading backwards from the end either. Close the magazine then come back and try again.
>You consider yourself enlightened.


Nice! You will most likely find both included.
I was going to make an index at the start instead of a table of contents but I think your idea is better.


>but I wonder if there is a demand for such a thing.
Let's create the demand! Don't post or make Discordian magazines for the past 10 years and then, when people begin to notice them missing, sell ours to all those suckers for free.


File: 1590647238374.jpg (122.47 KB, 719x803, Shirou Swords.jpg)

I've been planning on making a VN at the style of FSN and Dies irae, using discordian ideas.


there are oats in the throat of a goat on a boat in a moat.


File: 1591015973945.jpg (87 KB, 624x446, i49Jg.jpg)

the boat with a goat in the moat is afloat.


I'll start compiling an alpha negative-third draft of the magazine some time soon.


bump for interest


Alright then, I'll be interested.
I'll chuck a few articles in over the next two days, show you how empty and undecorated it is so far and hopefully that will motivate you all.


I wonder how much inspiration MAD magazines could provide. There are certainly bits and pieces that would fit right in.


Hey Pope, do you still have the source file or a vector file?


I have various versions here: https://files.catbox.moe/ohyb1u.7z


Awesome! I can now export that cover completely vectorized.
I'll add some text pages with draft, undecorated articles later today and upload it.


Which today?


Two day.
Minor but unavoidable shit happened and I switched to a different art software.


File: 1595431040915.pdf (859.64 KB, draft01.pdf)

This was mocked up in very little time. No design effort was made.
Half the pages are missing and half of the rest are placeholders.
At this point, content and ideas are the most important thing you can help with.
There is content in this thread I have not included yet. Don't worry. I haven't forgotten, I just rushed and forgot. I'll add more stuff from here next time.


File: 1595438121649.jpg (60.3 KB, 540x417, Polish conlanger.jpg)

I have to admit that I am a bit disappointed that our Polish friend's constructed language did not make it: >>>/b/1563

We might need to translate the Principia into it. We could publish it in segments, a page in each issue.


I'd be in favor of an Erisian conlang. If only there were more than one word. At least 5 are required, that or 23 characters custom characters.


Holy shit this is good. It's getting that style. I wonder if we can make the style of a gossip magazine compatible with 1960 typewriter shitposting


File: 1595476489423.webm (3.38 MB, 480x360, Big Bill's Hell.webm)

That's a good suggestion, I'll make it happen.

Excellent, style coming through means there's potential. That parodic faux-professionalism is my kind of humor and it's good to see it working.
>1960 typewriter shitposting
I've always been interested in historical shitposting and old memes, so I'm curious if you have some examples of it.
Semi-related: ancient Pompeii graffiti.


The 23 Signs page on page 5 is obviously a placeholder but I've come to like the SAMPLE TEXT off-topic list contrasting against the gossip mag slick layout of the cover. I might just do it like that and have a proper 23 Signs on page 11 pretending that first one never happened.


File: 1595487941575.jpg (171.29 KB, 912x2048, 40cfce1722e98227bf4fbce31f….jpg)

Wisdom is not in forcing four unnecessary words into the language but realizing that there's 1 (one) word with 4 (four) characters. 1 + 4 = 5.


File: 1595874633394.jpg (113.84 KB, 917x942, 1595538266317.jpg)

How did you export the XCF vectorized?


File: 1595893323899.png (192.26 KB, 420x420, 5.png)

I didn't.
I used it to help create a clone in Inkscape.

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