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(522.4KB, 1238x1024) 0) gyms aren't a requirement for fitness. resistance training including weightlifting is a very effective way, but not the only way.
1) you'll be yourself until you work to change that. realize that, don't just think it and then get demotivated that you're not there yet.
2) you can absolutely eat healthier, lose weight and gain muscle mass at home. if you don't buy equipment then you won't be able to do certain weighted compound exercises like deadlifts and weighted squats, but there are so many other effective exercises you can do anywhere, anytime with body weight alone. Pretty sure there's a whole subreddit about bodyweight routines with excellent wiki resources, including how to progress appropriately, they know more than me so just go there. (e.g. an underweight scrawny guy and an overweight heavy gal will do their first pushups with different technique to get the right amount of resistance)
Start with bodyweight stuff and adjusting diet (can't outrun a shit diet). Set measurable, short-term goals to motivate yourself. Once you can get some basic consistent habits going, then maybe consider making it tougher, but don't burn out instead.
