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(529.9KB, 800x800) Newly Discovered Roman News Report Found and Translated:
The Fiery Wrath of Discordia
By: Gaius Flavius, Senior Correspondent of Acta Diurna
In a shocking turn of events that has left the citizens of Rome in a state of disbelief and chaos, the Goddess Discordia has reportedly set ablaze the grand Colosseum during the much-anticipated chariot races. Witnesses claim that the goddess, known for her penchant for stirring trouble among mortals and deities alike, descended upon the arena with an air of disdain, declaring the races, “More tiresome than watching hair grow on granny tits.”
The incident occurred at midday when thousands had gathered to witness the thrilling spectacle of charioteers racing for glory. As the sun blazed overhead, so too did Discordia’s wrath. With a flick of her wrist, she reportedly summoned flames that engulfed not only the chariots but also sent spectators into a frenzy as they scrambled to escape the inferno.
“I was just here to enjoy the races,” lamented Marcus Tullius, a local merchant who had placed his bets on his favorite racer. “But then there she was! I thought it was part of the show until I felt the heat on my face!”
Authorities were quick to respond to this unprecedented act of divine vandalism. The Praetorian Guard rushed to contain both the fire and any potential panic among attendees. However, despite their best efforts, capturing Discordia proved impossible; she vanished into thin air amidst laughter that echoed through the cha